After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
