oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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