dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
