Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
