Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
