he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
