Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
