Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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