My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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