Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
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