my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.