For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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