so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Are these your boobs on my camera?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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