Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
