yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
