Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
