I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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