It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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