I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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