So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
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All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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