i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
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