He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
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