This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Randomize
