he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize