Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
