that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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