Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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