Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
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