i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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