What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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