Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
