we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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