thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
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