Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
