we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
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