He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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