Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
