Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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