I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
