I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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