Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
