Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
