How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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