Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
