Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize