I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
