im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Randomize
