My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
