Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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