I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
