i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Randomize
