do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
